twigged

Parenting a child with ADHD can be a challenge. No child is born with a manual, and we can find ourselves stumbling through the parenting process.

Often the traditional parenting methods don’t work for a child with ADHD, and things can snowball out of control. After diagnosis, parents can be left to fend for themselves without any support, and this is where twigged can help.

I started twigged to give parents support, guidance, and practical tools to help them navigate the complexities of ADHD. As a psychotherapist and mother of a child with ADHD I know how overwhelming it can all be. But I also know how transformative it can be with the right tools and resources to help our children thrive.

Parenting a child with ADHD can come with its struggles as well as its joys. Children with ADHD can be creative, full of life, full of energy, inventive and all manner of things but there are struggles when it comes to navigating a neurotypical world. It's important to embrace and celebrate their strengths as well as understanding their struggles.

At twigged, we aim to provide unique insight to parents of what the world with ADHD is like and why some behaviours occur. Most importantly, we focus on how to manage these behaviours in easy and simple ways to allow your family to go from surviving to thriving. We believe in progress over perfection, and in celebrating the small wins.

Thank you for being here with twigged. I look forward to joining you on your journey and helping you navigate ADHD and making it a little bit easier, and more importantly, more empowering.

Parenting a child with ADHD can be a challenge. No child is born with a manual, and we can find ourselves stumbling through the parenting process.

Often the traditional parenting methods don’t work for a child with ADHD, and things can snowball out of control. After diagnosis, parents can be left to fend for themselves without any support, and this is where twigged can help.

I started twigged to give parents support, guidance, and practical tools to help them navigate the complexities of ADHD. As a psychotherapist and mother of a child with ADHD I know how overwhelming it can all be. But I also know how transformative it can be with the right tools and resources to help our children thrive.

Parenting a child with ADHD can come with its struggles as well as its joys. Children with ADHD can be creative, full of life, full of energy, inventive and all manner of things but there are struggles when it comes to navigating a neurotypical world. It's important to embrace and celebrate their strengths as well as understanding their struggles.

At twigged, we aim to provide unique insight to parents of what the world with ADHD is like and why some behaviours occur. Most importantly, we focus on how to manage these behaviours in easy and simple ways to allow your family to go from surviving to thriving. We believe in progress over perfection, and in celebrating the small wins.

Thank you for being here with twigged. I look forward to joining you on your journey and helping you navigate ADHD and making it a little bit easier, and more importantly, more empowering.

A child's brain isn't fully developed until they're at least 25 which means they can't always apply logic and reason to emotional situations, just like when they fly off the handle at a broken breadstick!

I know this can be frustrating but it's important to remember that it's not their fault and it's just how their brain is working right now. Emotional regulation and impulse control are core executive functions and play a vital role in how children with ADHD respond to situations.

This is where our job as a parent comes in. it's not to react with frustration and punishment but to teach them the skills they need. We need to teach our children the skills they need to prevent a storm from occurring. If a storm does, we need to be their calm whilst it's raging,  through empathy, guidance and patience.

At twigged we use our unique three Cs method which is simple yet powerful and helps with communication. 

The twigged toolkit for ADHD isn't a magic wand - just like having a gym membership won't make you a bodybuilder. Simply having the toolkit won't solve everything. But with time, effort and repetition you will see progress.

You'll have good days and bad days, but remember this is not about creating the perfect family, where no one ever argues or shouts. That doesn't exist. It won't stop your children fighting all the time and it won't stop 100% of the meltdowns. What it will do is give you the tools to cope and support your child and guide you towards the progress that you are seeking. It will help reduce meltdowns and overwhelm and take out some of the tension in the household, whilst building the self-esteem of your child.

We are all human and we are all imperfect. So remember, this is about progress and not perfection. The best part is you can go your own pace. There are no scores, there are no right or wrong answers and there's no pressure. The toolkit is is built so that you can engage with the content that is relevant to your child. Whether you're wanting an overview or a deeper dive, you get to decide what is most useful for your family. 

At twigged we believe there are three states of ADHD, and we need to understand these in order to support your child. Each state affects how your child's brain and body responds to the world around them. Recognising these states is the first step in managing and supporting them effectively.

Let's talk about the steady state or green state. This is where your child's central nervous system is calm and regulated and they can respond in appropriate ways. In this state, they have access to their executive function skills and things feel manageable for them.

Next, we have the dopamining or sensory seeking state or amber state. This is a bit more complex. Dopamining is when your child's brain is seeking stimulation in order to get a dopamine hit. It's subconscious, but if the brain isn't getting enough dopamine, the brain will find a way to get it, even if it means it's from a negative source, such as fighting with a sibling, or a positive one, such as hyper focusing or engaging in a preferred task, Sensory seeking behaviour can be both positive or negative for the child, such as being happy or feeling overwhelmed and trying to self-regulate. Actions such as spinning, stimming or jumping can help regulate the nervous system and prevent a full blown meltdown due to overwhelm. Sometimes the behaviours associated with dopamining and the prevention of overwhelm can be challenging for us parents, especially when they're done in unsafe environments such as cartwheeling in a supermarket!

Finally, there's a 6F response, often known as fight or flight or the red state. This is when things rapidly escalate and your child becomes dysregulated. It feels like a child goes from 0 to 100 in no time. When they're in a 6F state, whether it's fight, flight freeze, fawn, flood of flop, executive functions are unavailable, such as emotional regulation, impulse control, so no amount of logic or reason will calm the situation.

Understanding these states is key to managing your child's behaviour and supporting them through each stage. Next, we'll dive into how to navigate these states with the tools and strategies you need to guide your child to the balance of a steady state. 

Ever wondered why on earth your child is behaving the way they are? Or found yourself perplexed on how to handle a particular situation? That's where our unique twigged behaviour funnel comes in.

Children's behaviour can often feel confusing, even to them. The behaviour funnel is a tool that I've developed through my professional expertise and personal experience, and it will help you find the root cause of your child's behaviour. By identifying the underlying issues, we can begin to support them in a way that encourages positive change rather than just addressing the symptoms.

The behaviour funnel can be used for immediate behaviours, like a tantrum, or longer term issues, like anxiety. It's a way of getting to the heart of what's going on, so you can approach it with understanding that will lead to transformative outcomes. Use the behaviour funnel to explore the underlying issues that may be influencing your child's behaviour.

By identifying why they behave the way they do, you'll be empowered to create a plan that suits your child in the best possible way. Let's look at the behaviour funnel together to uncover the root causes of your child's behaviour, which will turn confusion into clarify and support your child's growth. 

When a child feels unsafe, even if it is perceived unsafety, their behaviours can escalate and a 6F response may emerge, whether that's fight, flight, freeze, fawn, flop, or flood.

This happens because safety is closely linked to the automatic nervous system, or ANS. The job of the ANS is to scan the environment and everything we do, feel say and hear in order to tell us if we are safe. It's designed to help us survive. A little bit of stress is okay for children and can build resilience.

However, with ADHD, the levels of perceived stress are much higher. Children with ADHD take in far more information than their brain can process, and they struggle to filter out what's irrelevant. This overwhelm can cause the brain to misjudge the level of threat or even miss important information, leading them to feel unsafe more often.

Remember, safety isn't just physical. Emotional safety is just as important. It's the feeling that their integrity, beliefs, and personality are not being questioned. This emotional safety is the foundation of rejection sensitivity, which we'll dive into soon.

By understanding safety, we can help reduce those moments of overwhelm

When your parenting is met with arguments, insults, and defiance, it can sometimes be disheartening. It's easy to feel like you're hitting a wall and connecting with your child seems impossible.

However, connection is the key to everything. If you do nothing else, prioritise true connection. It's the one tool that can start to turn things around. It's the foundation that can rebuild trust and communication even when things feel tense. By focusing on connecting with your child in the twigged way, which isn't the same as connecting with them whilst you cook dinner or put them to bed, you will build a foundation of trust and support.

Through this connection, you can begin to shift the dynamic and work as a team towards the progress you both desire.

Remember, connection is the first step to change. Let's keep building those bonds and move forward with confidence.

I want to introduce you to the concept of brain energy. Brain energy is different to physical energy. It is the energy you have in order to make the most of your executive functions and to do cognitive tasks with.

Praise is a kind of superpower when it comes to children, but it is vital for those children with ADHD. How, and how much you praise your child will make all the difference. A good rule of thumb for children with ADHD is that for every one negative correction or comment, they need at least three positive ones. No matter how small they seem. Remember, by the age of 12, a child with ADHD has, on average, received 20,000 more negative comments than their neurotypical peers. And we need to change that.

Here are the five rules of praise:
 Praise with enthusiasm. Even if you have to fake it.
 Praise specifically. Praise the behaviour and not just the outcome. For example, “you did a good job at concentrating on your maths homework”, is far more powerful than a simple, “good job”.
 Praise with touch. A simple hand on a shoulder, a high five or a hug adds connection when praising and really boosts its power.
 Praise straight away. Timing matters. Praise immediately when you see good behaviour. Delayed praise doesn't have the same impact as it's not linked to the emotion and the task.
 Praise the small things and don't just wait for the big moments. Praise everyday actions like putting their shoes away or coming to the table when asked.

And remember, praise in public and correct in private.

Even with all the work you've done to pre-empt meltdowns, they will still occur albeit less frequently. Whether it's screaming, crying, or withdrawing, it can feel overwhelming for us as parents. So what can we do to help our children when they do occur?

Justice sensitivity is a trait often seen in children with ADHD. It’s characterised by a strong sense of fairness and the need for justice. This can impact social interactions, relationships, and emotional well-being.

Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria, or RSD, is a common trait in children with ADHD. It’s when they experience intense emotional pain or a strong reaction due to perceived or real rejection, however big or small.

Hi! I’m Gee, the founder of twigged. As a psychotherapist with a personal passion for supporting families with neurodiverse children. I know how difficult it can be to navigate the world of ADHD. But I also know how important and powerful it can be with the right tools and resources supporting you and your child.

Let's stop comparing neurodiverse children with neurotypical ones.

So far, we've touched on what ADHD looks like for your child and why traditional parenting strategies don't always work. We've explored how your child's brain has developed and the role of emotional regulation and impulse control in their response to the world around them. 

Welcome to the next part of the twigged toolkit for ADHD. It's brilliant to have you here for the next stage of your journey. 

The neurotransmitter dopamine plays a critical role in motivation and task completion for individuals with ADHD. There are two main dopamine pathways. 

We've now gone into more detail on what ADHD is and how it affects your child's brain, behaviour and emotional world. We've looked to the different states of ADHD. Understanding when your child is calm, when they're sensory seeking, and when they are in a heightened state of dysregulation. 

Welcome back to the twigged Toolkit. I'm so pleased you're here.

In this part, we going to look at why your child behaves the way they do. Understanding the reason behind their reactions can give you the insight you need to respond with clarity and support.

By the end of this, I hope you have some practical tools to better manage those challenging moments. You'll understand the root causes behind certain behaviour and you'll be equipped to respond in ways that support your child's emotional and developmental needs.

Let's now discover the why behind ADHD so you can support your child's unique journey. 

Imagine your child is always carrying a cup, but not just any cup, a sensory cup. These cups represent the sensory input each child can handle. Some children have large sensory cups, able to process more information without causing it to overflow whilst others have small cups which fill up quickly and are more prone to overflowing. This overflow shows up as overwhelm and is known as dysregulation.

While we can't change the size of their sensory cup, we can help manage the input they receive. This might involve using softer clothing, using earplugs in noisy places or opting for quieter. smaller group activities, as well as not going to some places at all.

By understanding how sensory load can affect your child, you can make adjustments to their environment and the activities they participate in, helping them stay regulated and making a world of difference to their lives. 

Is your child in a fixed or growth mindset? Understanding the difference between these two mindsets can have a huge impact on their ability to grow, develop and reach their goals.

Children in a fixed mindset believe that their talents, abilities and behaviours are innate and unchangeable. They might say, 'I'm just not good at maths', or 'I'll never be able to do that'. This mindset can hold them back from trying new things, facing challenges and pushing through obstacles. It's important to know that children with a fixed mindset aren't lazy. They truly believe that their abilities are limited.

On the other hand, children with a growth mindset believe that their abilities and behaviours can be changed and developed with hard work, perseverance and a can-do attitude. They embrace challenges, learn from mistakes and see progress through practise as the key to growth. When they face setbacks, they view them as opportunities to learn and improve, rather than seeing failure as a sign of inability. Research shows that a growth mindset can lead to better academic outcomes and long-term success.

Encouraging your child to adopt this mindset can help them approach life with resilience and a positive outlook. By nurturing a growth mind you're giving your child the belief that they can grow, learn and succeed no matter what challenges come their way. 

We've now looked at why your child with ADHD behaves in certain ways, how the brain processes information and how external factors like overwhelm and stress affect their behaviour.

I hope you can now better understand the root causes behind your child's reactions, and the patterns that influence their behaviour. This understanding is the first step in creating a positive and supportive environment.

Next up we'll focus on how you can practically support your child. We'll explore strategies and tools that can help manage behaviour, build that connection and foster a calmer, more peaceful home. 

Welcome to the How of the twigged Toolkit for ADHD. Here, we dive deeper into how to support your child with ADHD and provide you with practical tools from the twigged Toolkit for ADHD that you can start using right away. This is all about moving from understanding to action, giving you strategies to manage behaviour, build stronger connections and create a supportive environment for your child.

By the end of this, I hope you have the tools to navigate ADHD with confidence by knowing how to respond to challenges in a way that fosters growth, resilience and understanding for both you and your child. Let's get started and explore how we can make positive changes together. 

Now, we've explored how to support your child with practical tools from the twigged Toolkit for ADHD. I hope you now feel equipped with strategies to manage behaviour, strengthen connection and create a supportive environment for your child to thrive.

As you move forward with confidence, using these new tools to support your child's growth and development, know that twigged it is always here for you. Remember, we're all on this journey together and it's about progress and not perfection. 

Ever wondered what neurodiversity looks and feels like for your child ?

Imagine if you woke up in a world designed for someone completely different to you. The rules don’t quite make sense to you, , the noise is too loud, the instructions feel unclear—and everyone expects you to just keep up.

Executive Functions are a set of cognitive processes that allow us to control and regulate our behaviour in order to achieve our goals. They are housed in the upstairs brain or prefrontal cortex.